Last week, I went to an event. Now normally, I’m the plan ahead, super organized woman but for this event, it was very last minute. And honestly, if I was to be honest, I will admit, that the past year or so, I’ve been juggling so many things that I feel my life is a constant deal-with-it-as-it-comes. I still haven’t figured out if that’s the season I am in, or if I need to cut-down on stuff. Anyhoo, I digress.
This event was on another island, and while the preparations to travel, car, etc was covered—I failed to ask the two persons participating in this event, if it was open to public and whether tickets were required. This crossed my mind as I jumped in the car and drove there. The requirement of tickets was CONFIRMED as I walked up to the door and was stopped and asked to present my tickets. :gulp:
Me; I don’t have one.
Security: oh, are you waiting on someone to bring it out? You can stand there with the others
Me: ummm, I don’t know if they have one for me.
Security: Oh! I’m sure they do. Just stand to the side and call them
Me: I did. I’m not getting an answer
Security: keep trying.
Honestly, I was already thinking of Plan B, which was how I was going to hang around conference center until a time when tickets were no longer required or alternately, until the event was over and be the first at the door to greet them upon exiting.
However, there was another opportunity…as I stood, twiddling with my phone, recognizing that my current efforts at trying to reach someone were fruitless, I looked around with a bit of defeat. I mean, I had travelled to another island for this event, right?
Within 5 minutes of the defeatist thoughts, a familiar face whooshes by. I knew she wouldn’t recognize me for a number of reasons, so I did what I normally would NEVER do. I reached out, touched her and referred to her by a name, that would instantly alert her to who I was. I should also note, that in that moment of flurry, I honestly blanked out to what her name was.
Me: “hey, cuz!”
Y.W.: “hi!” as she rushes off, with a “how are you?” almost in the wind.
Me: I good, but I came to support the kids but don’t have a ticket!
Y.W.: grabbing my hand. “Come, lets go!”
The following 5 minutes was a whirlwind of activity as I grabbed her hand, and tried my best to remain connected as we are weaved in and out of crowds. There were a couple points where we were briefly stopped, and I merely said.. “I’m with her!” which immediately removed the potential barrier.
Finally we arrived at the door., where she needs to leave me as she has a fairly big role to play and I cannot go where she is going. She starts to inform the ushers, and then gets confuddled (she, too probably couldn’t remember my name in the midst of all that was ahead)—so I helped her and introduced myself.
The usher’s response is what really caught me by surprise. I was immediately escorted to the front of the room with other dignitaries. I then indicate that my support was for a particular group so I was (happily) moved to the “other side” so I could be closer to them, nonetheless, seated in the front row, literally next to the podium.
I, of course, start to feel a bit self-conscious. Yikes. I’m in the front of this place…Did I remember to put on the lipstick? Is my hair fixed? Dress too short? Dress too casual? And then did what is so natural but also destructive…
I. looked. around.
I looked around and started comparing.
Oh, those ladies have on hosiery. She has on a cute pantsuit. They have a sweater/scarf on (I had on a sleeveless dress).
And in that moment, I went from the confident person coming to support, to a misfit. Feeling as if I didn’t belong.
But something happened that caused me to have to take a second look at myself. For the remainder of the time, I was treated as a (very) special guest. I got offered many of the perks that special guests got to the point, that they thought I should have been invited to the platform to speak/make a presentation. The coordinators “settled” for me being acknowledged by the Master of Ceremonies, and I politely gave the Queen’s wave, as is called for in situations like these.
As I sat, I chuckled to myself, because these people were not thrown by my hair, clothing, or lipstick (lack thereof). I represented an organization and carried a title that meant I had something of value to offer them.
That is what mattered.
I brought value to their experience.
I’ve chewed on Friday’s experience a couple times since then and realized that the chain of events were probably orchestrated to remind me of who I am. But not just who I am, but what I bring when I am in a conversation, a workgroup, an event, an organization.
The second lesson was that sometimes, when we have a goal…as mine was to attend the event and support my students, we must get out of our comfort zone. Do things that otherwise may not be our norm. I’m definitely not talking about immorality or law-breaking. But for me, it means stepping out of the shadows, where I generally comfortably reside and introducing myself. For ALL that I am. Because I have the capacity to increase the value in a situation. Every. single. time. The same holds true for you. We each bring something different yet meaningful to the spaces we reside. And until that is etched into my consciousness and yours, we will underserve the people and places where we have been positioned to influence.
Selah.
Grace, peace and love,
Dr Gia