It is March and we are #diggingdeeper into life after trauma. You see, too often negative life experiences, whether occurring in childhood, adolescence or even adulthood become the entirety of our story rather than just an event in the story. To live free and whole, it is important to process traumatic experiences with a professional. Go get you a therapist, boo!! 💁♀️
This week, we will look at shame based thinking that is tied to these negative life experience. According to Dr Brené Brown, shame is an “intensely painful feeling or experience of believing that we are flawed and therefore unworthy of love and belonging.”
For too many of us, the direct or even indirect responses of those around us, in response to the traumatic experience causes us to be weighed down by shame. Unfortunately, in the days, months and years after the event(s) -reminders of the experience, can take you back, as if the experience was current. This is the act of being #triggered. Both the feelings attached to the original event and the act of being triggered can cause us to feel shame.
Shame is a prison and is debilitating because it attacks identity. Shame also causes us to feel stuck and despondent. When you think of the traumatic experience, what thoughts pop in your mind about yourself and your role in it? Ironically, recognizing these thoughts may cause even further shame, but please push through to journal and identify those unhealthy thoughts. It is important to identify these thought patterns as a first step...ultimately our goal is to replace them with healthier thoughts.
Here are some that I have found popularly come up.
I am broken.
It was my fault.
I am bad.
I am stupid.
Something is wrong with me.
📌 Today happens to be International Women's Day #IWD2021 and while there is nothing gender based about shame, in my experience growing up female (and sadly, religious) was rife for managing shame. So today in particular, I #ChooseToChallenge gender based shaming practices - body, marital status, clothing, hair, childfree or childless, violence survivor…whatever it is that the systems or people have made you feel less than about. Nah. we renounce it, today. Sis, be free and shine. ✨ #breakingthesilence
"They looked to Him and were radiant; Their faces will never blush in shame or confusion." Psalm 34:5 AMP #drgiasays #Jesusplustherapy #breakingthesilence #shamebasedthinking #cbt